Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
my grandpa was trying to put butter into the pepsi and i'm like "grandpa what are you doing" and he looks down and goes "well i guess that wouldn't taste good anyway"
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
I did not marry a roomba.
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