Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Randomize