i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
Randomize
