Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
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