so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
Randomize