so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize
