The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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