Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
