I hate your face
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
