I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
Randomize
