im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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