The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
Randomize
