Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Randomize
