White coat. Heels.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Randomize
