Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Randomize