You just made me feel so damn special
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
