i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
I will be naked everywhere
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
