sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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