You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
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