I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Randomize
