So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
fuck your aforementioned shoe
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Randomize
