Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize
