so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
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