so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
is that a dick in a sweater?
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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