have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Randomize