its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
Randomize
