you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
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