We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Randomize