it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
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