I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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