did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
Randomize
