We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
