hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
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