absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
