It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
Randomize
