420 ftw
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
