I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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