I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
Randomize
