If i come over, it means nothing
My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
