You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Are we still banned from the library?
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
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