You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
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