"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
