Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
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