yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
Randomize
