So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
Randomize