garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
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