i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
So here I am, sexting at work.
Randomize
