His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
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