i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
Randomize
