we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
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