I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
I didn't notice because vodka
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
