Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Randomize
